As people change with time, so do relationships, and it’s not uncommon for those who were adorably in love so many years ago to lose interest and their libido. One of the biggest causes of divorce is lack of intimacy. While sex plays a major role for one’s libido, so does one’s gender, making this topic even more complicated than just the common thought of “You don’t love me anymore.”
The Science of Men’s and Women’s Libidos
For women, it’s not uncommon to suffer from a low libido as they age, but other life factors can also play a major role in their sex life. Job-related stress, the natural declination of hormones, and even relationship problems are all contributing factors to women’s top reasons for a decline in libido. In addition, a recent study showed that women between the ages of 18-59 who lost interest in sex suffered from a condition called hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD).
Men, on the other hand, don’t suffer from the same causes of low libido, though some can have similar symptoms, including the lack of intimacy in a relationship, body fatigue, and, most commonly, erectile dysfunction. Erectile dysfunction is a combination of both mental and physical complications preventing a man from getting and maintaining an erection, a serious ego hit to any man trying to show their loved one the attention they need. Web MD indicates that a male who suffers from ED may not find immediate relief by simply popping a pill and may need to see a mental health professional as well to address the underlying issue.
Men Are Leading the Sex Dive
In recent studies, many are concluding that men are the ones in a relationship driving the lack of sex and intimacy. In fact, one poll conducted revealed that one out of four men no longer have sexual intercourse with their significant other and that rate greatly increases with age. Dr David Edwards, a GP specializing in sexual issues, shed some light on the subject stating, “Sexual problems are the most common cause of men crying in my surgery. I saw a man recently and his low libido had destroyed his previous relationship. He’d suffered with it for 12 years, and only came to me because his current partner said she would leave unless he sought help.”
Living with a High Libido
If a person is suffering from a lack of intimacy, regardless of which partner is losing interest in sex, having a higher libido can be quite difficult to manage. Having a drastic gap in their libido and interest in sex, combined with the emotional impact of feeling disconnected, the physical ailments of one’s sexual drive not being met, and the ongoing complications of the relationship, it can all be quite challenging for the partners involved.
Psychology Today offered some great tips on how to manage a high libido, including suggestions such as not taking it personally, trying a different approach, and even touching one’s partner without thinking about sex to fulfill one’s own physical contact needs.
Understanding that each person is different is key to surviving the sex dive, and having an open, clear way to communicate to your partner about your needs, current level of attraction, and personal interest in sex is key to fulfilling your needs and maintaining a healthy relationship. So if you are struggling with either a high or low libido, you don’t have to suffer any longer knowing that millions of other people suffer from the exact same condition.